I Don't Get It!

Here I go again, I did the same thing
Guess I didn't learn from the last time
Is something wrong with me?
Do I project a warning that says keep away?
I try to understand it but it doesn't make any sense!
How can one fall for another who does not even care?
How can one fall for another who doesn't give them the time of day?
Why does one even fall?

Am I lacking something in myself why I fall for these types?
Am I too nice, too caring, too forgiving, too soft, too compromising?
Or again I just have a big heart that is just misused and taken advantage of?
I am too heartbroken to believe that!
I don't get it!

How can one easily push away the one thing they desire but yet quickly accept the one who treats them like dirt?
How can one think twice about being with the one they trust but quickly accept the one they can't?
How can one think twice about being with the one they know but quickly choose the one they don't?
I don't get it!

So many years has passed that you know the best and worst of me
So many years has passed and yet the opportunity shows itself and you refuse!
Heartbroken is not the word anymore,
Ripped apart is not the word anymore,
Emotionless is not the word anymore,
Broken is not the word anymore,
Saddened is not the word anymore.
I have shed so many tears, so many times, so many times.
And here I am doing it all again!

But it's my fault I should have known better!
It's my fault, I ignored the warnings!
It's my fault, I should not have held on.
What is it that makes me hold?
I am so drained.
I am so tired.
I am so hurt.
I am so broken.
I am so confused.

I don't get it, I don't get it!!!
Dammit I don't get it!!!!!!!!!!

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